Is Your Child a Canary in the Coal Mine?

I am so glad that you are reading this because it means that I have the opportunity to tell you that if you have a child that has any kind of learning, behavior or mood problems, you are truly blessed.  You are blessed because you have an extraordinary child that has come to teach you a whole new and evolved way of understanding yourself, a whole new perspective on life and a whole new way of being a parent.

I see THE most amazing children every day in my consulting room. They tell me such insightful things! It blows me away.  After many years I have become more and more convinced that children with learning, behavior and mood problems have a heightened ability to know when things around them are ‘off’ – at home, at school, and anywhere they go.  I have come to understand that these children are like the canary in the coal mines. They have come to tell us that the way we are parenting and educating children today is not working.  They know there is a better way!

These children are so in tune with the energies around them that they can tell when the teacher is stressed, or when Mom is feeling anxious, or dad is storing anger; or when mom and dad have negative chemistry; or when there is a lack of authenticity and honesty.  They can tell when someone is faking positive emotions, not being present or in denial about their own inner pain.  And because they do not have language to tell us this, they develop symptoms and difficult behaviors.  Their symptoms and behaviors are their way of saying, ‘Hey Mom, Dad, Teacher, this not feel good, this not feel right.  Do something different’.   So, it is up to us to learn how to read and understand the messages our children’s symptoms are desperately trying to tell us.

We get it all wrong

Instead of recognizing them for their unique gifts, instead of being proud of the fact that they are differently gifted, and so in tune, instead of loving the idea that they have come to teach us, we see them as having ‘a problem’.  Our minds have become closed because we have become so performance and achievement orientated, so concerned that our children meet the expectations that are considered to be the norm, academically, socially, emotionally and every other way, so focused on the wrong values, that we cannot see the wonder of these children.

I am sad to say that my conclusion, having worked with so very many wonderful children who have so-called ‘disorders’, is that there is an extraordinary being behind what others are calling ‘a problem’ and by not recognizing this, we are stealing their light.  It seems to me that these children have an energetic vibration that too many healthcare providers, educators and parents don’t understand and may even find uncomfortable.

And then we look for the name of ‘the problem.’ The tragic part of this is that amazingly gifted children are being misdiagnosed, over-diagnosed and overmedicated.  We are giving millions of children diagnostic labels that don’t describe the wonder and magic of who they truly are.  AND worst of all, we are teaching them to believe that who they are, and how they are, is just not good enough.  We teach them that there is something fundamentally off and wrong with them – when in fact the problem lies with us!

My Plea

When we label millions of kids who respond to the world differently, who think differently, who learn differently, we fail to see them as what they really are – visionaries and artists and healers and leaders and innovators.  So, my plea to you, dear reader, is this: ‘Please hear what your children’s symptoms are telling you and learn how to do something different.  Please understand that their symptoms are offering you an incredible opportunity to learn how to be a parent that knows how to raise a child who learns easily, behaves positively, is confident and resilient, feels good and loves life.’

 

And here is the most incredible gift you will give your children when you listen to them instead of labeling to them:

For the very first time they will start to believe that…

And their symptoms will disappear.